13 Comments
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Kerry Madden-Lunsford's avatar

Beautiful words❤️❤️❤️

Chera Rizk's avatar

Abuse against women partners is so rampant…the 1 in 3 stat is only for physical abuse and that is even very underreported for so many reasons. When we include all forms of abuse such as emotional, psychological, financial, spiritual, verbal, and all the rest, the numbers are just untold. More women experience abuse than not. It is definitely not a good idea for a woman to get married in my opinion…too risky and dangerous….

“Abuse is the norm in heterosexual relationships” -Zawn Villines

“Most men psychologically terrorize their partners.” - bel hooks

Patriarchy tricks women into thinking they will be protected by their husbands when in reality their husbands are the most dangerous and risky thing that has ever happened to most of them. Dating men is the single most risky and dangerous thing a women can do with her life.

Lanier Isom's avatar

Also, I just found this Substack you may already know about, but it's all about what we're talking about. https://dremmakatz.substack.com

Lanier Isom's avatar

What is that quote that says something like what men fear most from women is ridicule and what women have to worry about is whether they will be harmed, even die, at the hands of men. Abuse in so many forms from the just as deadly but invisible coercive control, as you mention, to physical harm is the norm. It just takes your breath away.

Deborah Wiles's avatar

Virginia Durr is one of my heroes. She was outside the magic circle all her life but look at what she accomplished. Her determination and courage are models for women (and men) everywhere. But the boot on the neck of women starts in the cradle and is handed down the generations... your mother, my mother.... It's almost too much to contemplate and too hard to fight. Those "in charge" are counting on that.

Lanier Isom's avatar

It is almost too much to contemplate and I find myself, at times, exhausted by it all, but then I rally and it helps so much to connect to folks like you because we aren't alone in our sentiments and must stick together.

christina eaton's avatar

These modern Trad wives disgust me. I am all about doing what suits you, but they are projecting these fake Instagram worthy personas and leading so many young women into a false existence. Awesome words again Lanier!

Martha Mattingly Payne's avatar

Such an interesting perspective, Lanier. Thanks for sharing!

Alison Bruhn's avatar

So perfectly said, and heartbreakingly true.

Lee Sumner Irwin's avatar

Excellent perspective, Lanier. Restacked!